The First Three and Half Years

For the sake of all our sanity, I will attempt to break down our courtship into smaller increments so you're not staring at your computer for hours. This is the first three and a half years.


I met P at a holiday party of mutual friends in December 2004. I worked with the host, and P was one of his fraternity brothers. I thought he was someone else during about 75% of our conversation, a fact he didn't know until many years later. It seemed strange that I hadn't met him before. My sorority and his fraternity were homecoming partners during my freshman year, we have numerous mutual friends, and, well, MTSU is sort of a small community considering the 23,000+ enrollment. Anyway, he will tell you that he knew he loved me when my red high heels were sinking into the ground of the front yard as my girlfriends and I were leaving. I handed him my beer and said, "I'm done." He then asked for my number and gave my car keys to the DD.


I had very recently gotten out of a 2 1/2 year on/off relationship with C, a guy who took every one of our "breaks" to check another sorority (and once my own sorority sister) off his list. I also had standing plans to visit my "First Love" over the Christmas holiday in St. Louis (that's what you do after a break up, right, run back to your ex?). Regardless of this ridiculously messy situation, P insisted that we get to know each other. We clicked rather quickly, talked for hours (even during my road trip to Missouri to see First Love), and managed to make it to a pretty sweet first date at our still favorite restaurant.  A lot of craziness happened that will test the strongest of relationships, and we weren't anywhere close to ready to tackle what was in front of us. I think we'd both prefer to forget Spring 2005. Ultimately, we (read: me) weren't in the right place to get into a relationship. When P deployed to Turkey for the summer, I started dating J. P returned, took the news in stride, gave me an amazing puzzle ring I disassembled during a pitcher of margaritas, and we agreed to be friends. Remember how I said this man was patient?


After graduation, I moved to South Carolina to continue my education and P stayed in Murfreesboro to start a job. We remained close friends and visited with each other when we were back in Knoxville for holidays. J and I ended our relationship, and I swore off long distance romance. P once came to visit me in Columbia, and my back and forth, come and go affections were testing every ounce of patience he had in him. He came to Columbia with far greater expectations than I had for our visit. This was one of the first times I saw P truly angry with me. He had every right in the world to be so, but I wouldn't admit that for years to come.


Because of my refusal to work at my fear of commitment and his refusal to play my games, we didn't see each other again until I moved home during the summer of 2008 before moving to Georgia to start my first job. He had also moved back to Knoxville to start a new job. Looking back, it's amazing that he had any interest in remaining my friend. I chalk it up to our lives in our hometowns having moved on in our absences. Most of our friends were married, had families, careers, etc., and we were still drinking on week nights. So, we started hanging out again. Have I mentioned P is patient?